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Crying in Front of a Mirror

by Tom Santisi

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1.
i am trudging through this forest i've been following a map that i purchased from a wandering trader it said "leave behind the parts of you that keep you up at night" so i followed that advice and i went on my way and now i'm using my machete to cut my way through the leaves and i don't know where i'm going only where i used to be but everytime that i look back i see an all consuming flame and it is eating up the forest and to me it's on its way so i keep on trudging through this forest across rivers and through clearings and through snow and i hope to find some friends and a place to rest my head but i don't get sleep and i do trudge alone
2.
r/egg_irl 03:41
pass me the gender fluid i've been forgetting to stay hydrated so i've had nothing to say it's not the way i lose it like every once in a while it's not that i'm confused, it's just i've been perusing myself where have i been looking for something i could be where have i been looking for something i could be where have i been it's not that i've not been lucid or that i lost myself on the way it's just it's slightly belated that i would meet myself in a way it's in the way i prove it like every now and again it's not that i'm confused, it's just i've been perusing myself where have i been looking for something i should be where have i been what is it to me where have i been maybe i will maybe i wont maybe i'll stay maybe i'll go and i do decree there’s something i wanna be something i wanna be but i probably won’t
3.
Sometimes 04:10
and sometimes i fuck up sometimes i do the dumbest shit i can surprise myself lay awake thinking that i'm full of it and sometimes i fuck up oh yeah, but doesn't everyone? but i really do surprise myself when i end up having too much fun and i make bad decisions that much seems unavoidable and i am human and that is inescapable and i get anxious and overcompensate for that i try but i just can’t help that fact and sometimes i fuck up for no good reason and i hurt someone even though i had no ill intent i still lay awake thinking that i'm full of it and i am lucid at least half of the time and it gets putrid when i pay no mind and i get anxious and overcompensate for that i try but i just can’t help it i try but i just can't help it yeah, i try but i just can't help that fact and i am lucid at least half of the time and it gets putrid when i pay no mind and i get anxious and overcompensate for that i try but i just can’t help it i try but i just can't help it yeah, i try but i just can't help that fact
4.
have you ever fallen in love? i mean really gone full downside up and did you ever fall into quicksand i mean really been properly stuck and has your left brain ever completely shut off and all you're left with are these feelings you've got and have you ever felt the negative symptoms of limerence and did you ever wish you were nought but a bug i'm only asking cause i've been there as well and looking back i wish i could left-right myself that's why i'm askin that's why i'm askin that's why i'm askin that's why i'm askin so have you ever fallen in love i mean really been hit by a truck and felt the tingle of the hot pavement on the open wounds as you lay there in the sun i'm only asking cause it's a personal hell i do hypothesize one inflicts on oneself and oneself only that's why i'm askin that's why i'm askin that's why i'm askin so did you ever see the break of the dawn or was your hope all by that point withdrawn i'm only askin cause it's a beautiful day as you wash off all of the mud and the clay and as you watch the sun creep into your view i promise nothing more will terrify you i promise nothing more will terrify you i promise nothing more will terrify you i promise nothing more will terrify you
5.
Fold 02:38
fold the map and everything is easier i can trick you into anything fold the map, fold the map fold fold the map and everything is easier i can trick you into anything fold the map, fold the map fold i'm on probation across the sun i'm on your shoulder do what must be done fold the map and everything is fold the map and everything is fold the map fold the map, the map and everything, the map fold i'm on probation across the sun i'm on your shoulder do what must be done
6.
Grey 03:02
i try to be bold like the red of the heels that you bought to go as velma for halloween i try to be soft like the green of the dress the i bought for my old love in the land of the queen and i try to find something, something, anything that i can say but i'm just grey i'm just grey i'm just grey and i try to shine like the yellow and purple and all of the colours that donnie wears but i pay no mind to the woman inside of my mind, i’m just pretending that she isn't there and i try to find something, something, anything that i can say but i'm just grey i'm just grey i'm just grey i try to touch green like the grass or the trees i try to get out of my head and onto the scene but instead i stay under my sheets scrolling through bullshit endlessly and i try to find something, something, anything that i can say but i'm just grey i'm just grey i'm just grey
7.
[maybeclaire] and baby, baby, won't you come around? baby, baby, won't you come around? baby, baby, won't you come around? baby, baby, won't you come around? and tonight and tonight and tonight and tonight cause [MC Bumpz] i've been waiting for something like this for so long i've been waiting for something like this for so long i've been waiting for something like this for so long i don't wanna wait any longer, my love my love my love my love [maybeclaire] cause baby, baby, won't you come around? and baby, baby, won't you come around? and baby, baby, won't you come around? and baby, baby, won't you come around? and tonight and tonight and tonight and tonight [Tom] i'm waiting for something i'm waiting for something, waiting for something, waiting for something [maybeclaire & MC Bumpz] maybe you were thinkin that i was someone that you could help it happens everytime
8.
Pluvio 03:23

about

Wow it's like an album or something!

Don't feel like saying much right now, I just wanna get this out so I can move onto the next thing, but I am proud of this one.

There's some more detailed blurbs for each track if you click on them, as well as lyrics.

Thanks for listening, purchasing, and sharing
- Tom

credits

released July 28, 2022

literally everything - Tom Santisi

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Tom Santisi Australia

it's been like 8 years and i still can't figure out what i want to write here

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