1. |
butterfly
03:48
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i don't go outside, i stay in my room
i don't leave my bed, i stay cocooned
i write a new song, forget an old one
and when i get tired i move on
i don't see my friends, at least not that often
they come and they go, and i don't take offense
i make some new ones, an old one gets going
and when i'm alone i move on
it's not that easy
for me i do struggle
i do take my time
i'm not that easy
to find in the rubble
a new butterfly
in lieu of tinker's construct i play with tetra instead
i find my way out of the voice in my head
i find some new mods, forget some old ones
and when i get bored i move on
it's not so breezy
for me i do struggle
i do take my time
i'm not that easy
to find in the rubble
a new butterfly
it's not that easy
for me i do struggle
i do take my time
i'm not that easy
to find in the rubble
a new butterfly
to find in the rubble
a new butterfly
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2. |
beginning
03:51
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your riding in just to be going away
is short curcuiting everything i wanted to say
so i wont open my mouth cause i've forgotten how to speak
i'm sure i'll start to remember, and it'll come back to me
i played piano in your living room
i played that murder dream song by sun kil moon
i must've covered it well cause then you started to cry
but you knew something i didn't, i didn't know at the time
your sudden announcement of wanting a change
made it hard as heck to articulate
but now i'm happy to be singing cause i've remembered how to breathe
and now it's plus one friend and all the freedom i need
i played piano in your living room
that murder dream song by sun kil moon
i must've covered it well cause then you started to cry
but you knew something i didn't, i didn't know at the time
i played piano
in your living room
i played that murder dream song
by sun kil moon
i must've covered it well
cause then you started to cry
but you knew something i didn't
i didn't know at the time
ooooooOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooOoooooooooooooooooooOOOooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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3. |
good morning
02:07
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good morning, we should rise, though the sun has not yet risen
i wonder if we could go get a bite to eat
take your meds, get your head into a state of calmness
and wait for the sun to come up around the bend
alternatively
we could just go back to sleep
and dream of everything that we could be
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4. |
irreverent
02:55
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woo
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaah
and calling your name because you're running away from everything i thought you figured out by now
so irreverent
she said
you're wrong man, it's totally irrelevant
you only focus on the negatives and multiply the parts that make you proud of what you're selling
so
call it a shame or go on placing the blame right bang smack onto yourself
so intelligent
i mean
you can't keep giving him chances, you only focus on the positives and turn a blind eye to the abuse that you've been getting
still
i might be jealous, it's true
but i think i've still got something relevant to tell you
get away and find someone new
that's honestly what i think you should do
and the position is dry but if you give it a try i'm sure you'll find some counterplay on the queenside
despite it being so congested
and while i know what you mean
i kinda feel like you're kasparov and you're sacking your queen
i'm really not getting out of this one
alive
still i might be jealous it's true
but i think i've still got something relevant to tell you
get away and find somebody new
that's honestly what i think you should do
and i know i shouldn't care so much
and i know i shouldn't care so much
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooOOOOOOO oh hhhhhhh hhhhhh
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5. |
lost along the way
03:03
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time is ticking, i'm a mess, a ticking time bomb
i don't know where my heart is gone
i must've lost it with myself
so won't you come and find me, i got lost along the way
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
and won't you come and find me, i got lost along the way
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
so once again i don't know what to say
cause i'm drinking and thinking and sobbing
and wishing this nightmare would just go away
i'm lost within myself
so won't you come and find me, i got lost along the way
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
and won't you come and find me, i got lost along the way
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
can anyone hear me calling out?
cause i'm beginning to feel so much self doubt
and
once again my toungue is tied, too afraid to speak my mind
what was that you said the other day?
come and find me, i got lost along the way
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
and won't you come and find me, i got lost along the way
(let me be myself)
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
(let me be myself)
and won't you come and find me, i got lost along the way
(let me be myself)
and won't you come and find me, i've been lost since yesterday
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6. |
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scraping off the burnt bits early in the morning
forget about my nightmare, it wasn't that important
reaching for the jam with the strawberry
grab a monster for some energy
hop on twitch.tv and i end up watching lumi
i'm wondering 'bout my nightmare, i guess it really threw me
lumi's talking 'bout a lot of feminist philosophy
i fucking love this shit i really love to see equality
eat the burnt toast with the strawberry jam on it
feeling parasocial but i'm getting kinda used to it
i really wanna write about what happened in my head
when i was a tossin' and a turnin' in my bed
i hop onto my laptop to try to write some words down
dangerously closing in on breaking the 4th wall now
crack open the drink as i finish verse four
and i don't really wanna talk about my feelings anymore
i don't wanna talk about my feelings anymore
yeah i don't wanna talk about my feelings anymore
yeah i don't wanna throw my heart right out onto the floor
yeah i don't wanna talk about my feelings anymore
ooOOoooOoooohhhhh
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7. |
sleeping with scissors
02:09
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rivers and rivers
making me shiver
give me the chills when i'm sleeping with you
silence and sadness get beaten down
adrenaline rushes taking me to town
like getting drunk on the moon
or doing bongs on a cloud
i can see everything and i don't wanna come down
sleeping with scissors holding my hand
cause you're there for me when nobody understands
sleeping with scissors holding my hand
cause you're there for me when nobody understands
rivers and rivers
and waterfalls too
if i ever come down i'll be wearing you
but don't romanticize your illness you fool
but when illness befalls me what am i to do?
sleeping with scissors holding my hand
cause you're there for me when nobody understands
sleeping with scissors holding my hand
cause you're there for me when nobody understands
for if i can't make jokes and see the beauty in everything
i'll lose all the light and the fat lady will sing
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8. |
undress (acoustic)
03:05
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and everyone's watching me undress
and inside my mind they can see how i'm feeling
i wish i could just wear a summer dress
or something equally pretty, or a little more revealing
this isn't the best hook that i've ever written
but my serotonin's never felt so omitted
day 6 on effexor and i still wanna die
but i'm starting to feel like myself for the first time in a long time
and i'm changing meds
yeah i'm changing meds and gettin' brain zaps
all through my head
and there's no escaping the reality
and i had that dream again
the one where i cry about the fact that i'll die
and ideate suicide
as much as it tempts me i've only one life
this isn't the best hook that i've ever written
but my serotonin's never felt so omitted
day 6 on effexor and i still wanna die
but i'm starting to feel like myself for the first time in a long time
i'm buying cigarettes
i'm buying cigarettes and i'm smiling politely
to the cashier
and there's no escaping the impending fear
it's happening again
cut out an ingrown nail, somewhere between self harm and self care
and everyone's watching me confess
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9. |
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(an excerpt from William Shakespeare's "The Tempest", Act IV, Scene I)
And like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself
Yea, all which it inherit - shall dissolve,
And like this insubstantial pageant faded,
Leave not a rack behind. We are such stuff
As dreams are made on, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep. Sir, I am vexed.
Bear with my weakness. My old brain is troubled.
Be not disturbed with my infirmity.
If you be pleased, retire into my cell
And there repose. A turn or two I’ll walk
To still my beating mind.
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10. |
butterfly (demo)
03:20
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11. |
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12. |
irreverent (demo)
03:00
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13. |
good morning (demo)
02:01
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Tom Santisi Australia
it's been like 8 years and i still can't figure out what i want to write here
Tom Santisi recommends:
pinegrove go brrrrrrrr
go to album
I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning (Remastered)
by Bright Eyes
this is the album that got me into bright eyes, and subsequently conor oberst, and then phoebe bridgers. Thanks IWAIM
go to album
1000 gecs
by 100 gecs, Dylan Brady & Laura Les
gecgecgecgecgecgecgecgec
go to albumIf you like Tom Santisi, you may also like:
Delicate and personal folk-pop from Castle Theater: honest observations and reflections presented as thoughtful, well-written miniatures.
go to album
Breezy acoustic pop from Dunedin, “Caprice” floats feathery vocals over sunny guitars and keys.
go to album
There's a little Mazzy Starr and Beach House in these melancholic yet alluring dreamy folk tunes from LA.
go to album
